Friday, July 27, 2012

Fat Athletes

I love that the Google home page today celebrates people of all shapes and sizes.  We all have body issues, right?  (Let me get up on my soapbox once more to yell about how I resent the boxes society tries to put me in.)  I think my breasts are too small/I'm too tall/my belly is too round/my feet are too big/my hair is too big - WHATEVER.  So in general I'm in favor of media and artists giving me images I can live up to, rather than airbrushed Barbies.  At face value this picture does that, right?  Pictured above I see a rainbow team including: a soccer ball shaped football player, pearish swimmer, lanky runner, squat javelin thrower, and perky fencer.  Great.  Except that Olympic athletes give up normalcy to attain peak physical form.  They spend years becoming perfect specimens at the top of their sport.  You're not fooling anyone, Internet. We know what Olympic athletes look like:  

Hmm...  Well those athletes are actually pretty varied...  They do look a hell of a lot more fit than those lumpy cartoons above though.  In which case, what's the lesson here?  Is it that Americans are into watching TV and eating fast food and turning off their brains?  A, "Shape up couch potatoes! It's not okay to be healthy and inactive!" sort of lesson?  Or is it a "Hey Media!  You're making me miserable with these ideas you're shoving down my throat!" sort of lesson?  I don't know.  But once I finish this dark chocolate bar I am going to figure it out.


Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Escapism and Summer Reading

For those of you who don't know me well, I have little to no self-control where a good book is concerned.  I'm like a nerdy meth head, thinking only about when I'll get my next literary fix.  And this summer, I've really been bingeing.  There's a thing about summer reading, a sort of unspoken cultural idea that come summer it is our God-given right, not to mention our patriotic duty, to put aside textbooks, nonfiction, and the classics in favor of books that are, well... fluffier.  Books we actually want to read, as opposed to those books we think we should read.  Although I tend to read this way all year long, lately I've been shouldering a very large part of the fluffy burden.  For America!  That or I'm experiencing a massive bout of avoidance.  Whichever it is, the upshot for you is a phenomenal reading list... if you're a nerd.  With no further ado, I give you the reason(s) we haven't hung out or talked in weeks:

It really started with A Game of Thrones, back in May.  My friend loaned it to me, saying I wouldn't be able to put it down.  I knew I'd probably enjoy it (it's popular for a reason, right?) but I hadn't been in any rush to read it.  And my friend was right, I couldn't put it down.  One day I read from morning to night, for probably twelve hours straight.   The next day I went looking for the sequel, A Clash Of Kings at the thrift store.  It wasn't there.  But I DID find the third and fourth books, A Storm of Swords and A Feast for Crows, waiting like little homeless kitties.  It was meant to be!  Naturally as soon as I got home I ordered the second book on the internet - for 7 cents.  Ridiculous, right?  The waiting for book two would've been awful, but I luckily went out of town for a week, and it arrived shortly.  And then all of a sudden it was three weeks later.  I basically read during every spare moment (this includes while eating and brushing my teeth).  Imagine me waiting tables with a too-happy smile on my face while frantically wishing my guests would shut up and pay so I could break the sound barrier rushing home to find out what happens to Arya Stark.    Honestly, I think this whole pattern is part of the reason I was in no hurry to start reading the series in the first place - because I knew once I started I wouldn't be able to stop.  

The whole Game of Thrones series didn't disappoint, for the most part.  They are entertaining, interesting, thoughtful books.  They're fun to read.  The author shifts point of view between a wide variety of characters, giving the reader a really global perspective of the story.  And not all the characters are men either; I'd say maybe a third of the main characters are women, and amongst those are some really strong interesting females.  I commend Martin for taking the female perspective into account, although it seems like a pretty natural thing for him to do.  I don't think it's always easy to write from the opposite gender, but he handles the task well.  I don't want to say much more about the stories, but if you like fantasy, or epics, or HBO, or history give these books a shot.  I warn you though, you may lose your summer tan while you're inside reading for the next six weeks.

Next I started reading The Crying of Lot 49 by Thomas Pynchon.  I've only read one other book by him, but he sticks in my head as an important American author that I ought to like.  So this has been in my short stack for a while.  By the third chapter I was so reminded of Neal Stephenson's Snow Crash that I had to put Pynchon down, though.  It was a good move; I don't regret it (and I don't know when I'll go back to the Pynchon).  Snow Crash is like an old friend - I've probably read it six times.  It is a pivotal cyberpunk novel.  If William Gibson is the father of cyberpunk, Snow Crash is the poster boy (this analogy is faulty but I like it so I'm leaving it anyway... Really I should be saying that Neal Stephenson is the poster boy of cyberpunk, but I kind of think he's a dick...).  Directly after finishing Snow Crash I revisited The Diamond Age: or, A Young Lady's Illustrated Primer by the same author.  These books fire me up.  They take place in a not-quite dystopian vision of the future where smart-tech permeates everything, and nations have come out of the closet as corporate identities.  They're funny and really smart and make me excited about making art.  Read them.

From there I borrowed a bunch of books from another friend, including Catching Fire - otherwise known as the second Hunger Games book.  This is another one I was in no hurry to read.  I read the Hunger Games maybe six months ago, and enjoyed it.  But I didn't like it enough to search it out.  Besides, I knew it would come my way eventually.  Catching Fire satisfied me.  It was readable, entertaining, and very fast.  I do have some annoyance toward Katniss's perpetual dissatisfaction with whatever boy she's with.  I have even more annoyance toward Suzanne Collins for recycling that stupid plotline.  I know that society and mother culture tell women we should want nothing more than to have two boys fighting over us, but I think it's bullshit.  First of all, how often does it actually come about that you have two equal-but-opposite, good-looking, interesting guys you can't choose between?  Second, there's way way WAY more to both the human and female experiences than romance.  I'm trying in my own life to learn this lesson, and it would be a lot easier if it wasn't all over the media (yeah yeah yeah, write it myself, I hear you).  Anyhow, I enjoyed the book, but again, I'm not rushing out to get book three.  If someone wants to loan me Mockingjay I'll gladly borrow it.  And no, I do not use a reading device-they make heart dissolve.

I've guess I've been lonely, because I revisited another old friend next; The Time Traveler's Wife.  I LOVED this novel when I read it four and a half years ago.  I didn't disappoint the second time around.  The movie did it NO justice.  I noticed something different this time though.  (SPOILER ALERT)  The book perpetuates the cult of youth  and beauty vis-a-vis women.  Now that I'm almost 30 I read the story with different eyes, and it's pretty impossible to ignore Clare's age throughout the story.  You get plenty of adult Henry and little girl Clare, but not the other way around.  Once again it's acceptable for a man to love a younger woman (or young girl), but god forbid we read a story about a woman and a boy.  And then Clare's story basically stops after Henry dies, but that's the part I'm most interested in!  What happens after he's gone?  What happens when she has to learn to really stand on her own?  How does she manage?  You basically get one or two brief glimpses, but then nada.  Don't get me wrong.  I love this book.  Read it!  These are just some things I've noticed.


Okay, that's all I've got attention span for (I actually just want to get back to my book).  You may be interested to know that I'm reading a hard sci fi novel right now called Broken Angels, which is the sequel to Altered Carbon.  It's about downloading consciousness into different bodies.  And you may also be interested to know that somewhere in there I read the screenplay for Notes on a Scandal (speaking of women and boys - shudder).  And I've been slowly making my way through The Daring Book for Girls, which is AWESOME.  Today I learned how to put my hair up with a pencil, yesterday how to make a variety of different knots.


What are you reading this summer?  What did you think about these books?  Do you have something you want to loan me?  I take care of the books I borrow, and I return them.
xoxox

Sunday, July 15, 2012

On Thursday I put my best friend on a plane to Boston.  Well, actually, I chucked her out in the parking garage across from the American terminal at LAX because we accidentally entered the structure and couldn't figure how to get out without her missing her plane.  Oh the irony - but that's a different story.  She visited me for almost a week, and we had a lovely time.  I have many friends.  Many good friends, many close friends, many people in my various circles that I know and like well.  But there are few people with whom I can really let go and be myself.

This is overexplanatory emotional tripe.  I'm trying to tell you about how I took my cat to the vet because he has a gnarly wound, and how I broke down while he was there because I was really worried about him and really lonely and felt like there was no one I could call.  I wanted to tell you a funny, self-deprecating story about how my cat is an extension of myself, and my horoscope this week said, (I'm paraphrasing here) "You're on a giant universal lathe right now, that is spinning you around and around, transforming you into something more beautiful and useful.  This is a painful process, it's worth it though."  I think this is funny because according to the vet, my cat seems to have pierced his side on something very like a lathe (my analogy, not hers).  And when I was showing people on myself where his wound is, it's basically the same place as my tattoo.  Coincidence?  I think not.  I felt so alone while Zaphod was at the vet yesterday.  I felt like, "That cat is my lifeline.  Without him I will be truly alone in LA."  I missed my family desperately.  I wanted to be able to hang out at someone's house where I don't have to try, I don't have to look good, I don't have to be entertaining or helpful or explain the background of my thoughts.  Coming from a week of BFF bliss (BFFB!) this aloneness and family-missingness was even harder to swallow.

Tonight I returned to my acting class after a six week hiatus.  It was good to be there, but also kind of tough.  Right before going to class I got some other news that really called some things into question.  The funny thing is, this other news isn't my news.  It's someone else's news (so I won't share it with you).  News that I should be happy about!  That I am happy about, if I stop to think.  But like so many things in life, when I heard this happy fare I immediately made it about me.  I hate that that's my reaction, but that's what it was.  And then, I came home.  We have a tradition of going to drinks after class, and certainly tonight, after my absence, should have been a night to celebrate.  Except I guess I didn't feel like celebrating.  Instead I came home to lick my wounds.  I wanted to check on my poor drugged out cat, stumbling into things with his cone, rolling around on his shaved belly with tubes sticking out (it's pretty freaky looking).

Sometimes I think, "Chatty Cathy really doesn't have to hang it out so much."  I had a guy tell me recently that he read my whole blog, and I wondered if that meant there was too much information here.  I don't know if these rambling musings are interesting or self-indulgent.  And I am making an effort to express more through art than through what is basically an embarrassing live journal.  But here it is anyway.