Squirrel Man

It's almost Halloween (well, it's almost October.  I get excited-shoot me), so I thought I'd take a little time out and tell you a horror story.  Whoooo-ooooh! (That's me doing a scary sound).  So let me tell you about Squirrel Man.  A truly fearsome individual.

Okay, so this one time I went to the park to go running.  (What?  Horror stories start like this: full on normal-world mundanity. ) So anyway, I obviously needed to stretch first, because that's what they say you should do.  And I'm a follower.  So I walked up to this big tree by the path and leaned on it while I stretched my hammies. You know, I'm just hanging out, maybe imagining actor things, ankle in hand, stretching whatever that muscle is.

Now, I had noticed, when I first approached the tree, that there was a little squirrel kind of heading my direction, but I thought nothing of it.  Maybe it had a nest in my hamstring-stretching-balance-tree.  So what?  Wait, squirrel.  Me first.  But then right around the time I switched legs I noticed that my little buddy had a friend.

Okay, picture this: He's super tan.  Like, that kind of tan like you're outside all the time because you don't have a home-you're maybe homeless.  And I could tell how tan he was because he wasn't wearing a shirt.  I think it might've been hanging from the back pocket of his very oversized jeans, but that really wasn't my focal point.  This intense young (old?  He was actually kind of ageless, maybe he was a weird immortal like in the Sandman, or a mutant....) man observed me from underneath his head scarf, and I realized he was originally coming to my tree, but I beat him to the punch.  You snooze you lose, guy!

What was weird about this dude though (as if he wasn't weird enough already-although, in fairness, people work out at that park...  Maybe that's why he was shirtless.) was that he had a jar of peanut butter and a butter knife.  Now, I know you were wondering about his relationship and interaction with that little squirrel, so let me drop the bomb on you:

He was feeding the squirrel.  He was using his butter knife to spread peanut butter on the tree next to mine.  I realized at this point, that I was using his peanut-butter-squirrel-tree to stretch.  Whoops.  So he's buttering the tree, and the squirrel is eating peanut butter upside down off the tree, and Squirrel Man is crouching by his pal,  watching me watching him. Whoops again. Caught staring.  Then he offered the knife to the squirrel; feeding it directly off the knife.  He looked at me again, and as we made eye contact he took the knife and licked it himself.

Ewwwwwwwww!  Gross!  Squirrels are rodents!  Rabies!  Ewwww!

And then I ran away.  Seriously, I started running around the park.  And the Squirrel Man faded into the night (morning) to haunt the dreams of children (joggers.  Me) forever.  So whatever you do  watch out of the Squirrel Man!

Nothing New: the bike post

What is up my 9 followers?  You are some of my favorite people on the internet, just sayin.

I have to go imagine some things for acting class tonight, so I'll keep this brief.  I just wanted to let you know how Nothing New is going:

GREAT.  Yeah, so that bike that my neighbor gave me is sweet.  The guys at the Bicycle Kitchen were really helpful.  For $22 dollars they showed me how to change the tires, hooked me up with a couple of used tires in good condition, straightened the rims and oiled the chain.  Go there.  I will definitely be back.  And then yesterday I went for a ride in Griffith Park.  It was kind of an ambitious ride, but I saw so much of the park, it's definitely the way to experience Griffith.

I'm really jazzed about biking; I'm so tired of my car.  But now I need a lock and a helmet.  The lock I will definitely be purchasing used.  If anyone has one let me know.  As for the helmet, if I can find a pre-owned but not really used one that would be ideal.  However, if necessary I will buy a new one.  I know it's not really that cool to where a helmet, but let's face it, I have a history of accidents.

Also, you'll be interested to know that I purchased remanufactured ink cartridges for my printer.  They've always been wonderful in the past, this time I had the misfortune to be sent an empty black cartridge, but hopefully they'll replace it.  And I can send my old ones back to be reused.  Hurrah!

As for that other thing...  Nothing to report, let's just leave it at that.

Begging for it: An exercise in asking for what I want

"I think there's a jump some people have to make, sometimes, and if they don't do it, then they're stuck good... Some jumps you have to decide on for yourself.  Just figure there's something better waiting for you somewhere..."
                     - Count Zero, William Gibson


I've been thinking about the lesson I learned in asking the universe for a bike.  I voiced my desire for a bicycle out loud, on Facebook.  And then, having admitted and asked for what I wanted, I realized that there was someone specific who might be able to help me, and I voiced what I wanted to that person.  And surprise, he gave me a bike, and it was easier than I had thought it would ever be.

So I'm going to put it all out there right now:

I want to be a working actor.  I want a new agent, commercial and theatrical.  I want a manager.  I am not in the union, but I am a great actor, and I am confident in my ability.  If anyone can get me a referral I will do something special for you.  It will be tailored to you, I might take you to lunch or I might make you something or who knows (requests can be made).

I want to work.  I want to create art and collaborate and have people see it.

So I'm going to do it.  And yes, I did just quote William Gibson.  Because he's really cool.  And I'm a big nerd.

Nothing new-1st update!

Unintentionally it is exactly 4 weeks since my first post about not buying anything new.  Allow me to clarify one thing about this idea:  I am allowed to buy used things.  I am not allowed to buy anything that hasn't already been owned, with a few exceptions: shoes, underwear, food, toiletries, art by artists I wish to support financially.

It's interesting to me that almost a month has passed and this really hasn't been a stretch for me.  Of course, I have always been a garage-saler/go-through-your-curbside-leftovers/thrift store shopper.  I like used stuff.  So I'm not terribly surprised.

So far the main shift in my thinking is about plastics.  For example, when I moved back in March I decided to reuse my Ziploc bags.  They're really expensive, and sometimes they were barely used at all, and I'd just throw them away.  So I started washing them with the rest of my dishes and drying them on my dish rack.  Since I've started this project, however, I've avoided using my Ziploc bags completely.  I still have some in my drawer, but why put half an avocado in a Ziploc bag when I could use a piece of Tupperware?  Incidentally, I only have two pieces of store-bought Tupperware.  I also have an abundance of clean sour cream containers and mustard jars in my cupboard.  It's basically the same thing as Tupperware, and totally reusable.  And I'm recycling more.  I have to confess, I wasn't great about it before I started doing this.  It wasn't totally convenient to me because I didn't have a container for it, and my apartment complex doesn't have recycling bins.  But the two buildings next door to me do have recycling bins out most days of the week, and I took the bucket I was using for dirty dishtowels for my recycling.  Voila.  I was just being lazy before.  Cause here's the thing.  I figured what's the point of consuming less if I'm still throwing away bottles?  This is a no-brainer, but I just needed to really think about it, and then start doing it.  FYI, I also stopped using paper towels.  I use rags instead when I need to clean-usually it's cat vomit I'm picking up.

Through the magic of asking the universe for what I want I came by a bike.  I put it out there on Facebook that I wanted a used bike.  Then I asked my neighbor if he knew where I could get one, and he gave me one that he's not using.  It needs new rims and tires.  His stipulation was that I fix it, and then ride with them.  Pretty good deal!

And I'm pleased with the fact that I made it happen by asking for it.  I could use that lesson in my career in a big way.  In fact, that's kind of the lesson of the blog.  So I haven't gotten the new rims yet, but I plan to take it to the Bike Kitchen this weekend, where they'll teach you to work on it yourself and might have used parts.  So that's cool, I'll be sure to update.  Riding it is a scary prospect (lest you forget I chipped my two front teeth in a bike accident), but I'll cross that bridge (hopefully on my bike) when I come to it.

I was rather puzzled recently about getting a new toothbrush.  I used to have a Sonicare, but it wore out.  It seems like a good idea because it lasts so long, but I'm not really into gadgets.  And I'm not the type to go out and buy one.  Trader Joe's supplied me with a toothbrush recycled from yogurt cups though!  And the packaging can be used to return it to be recycled!  

I also scored a razor by the same brand at Whole Foods.

I was in Boston this week, and got a pair of earrings made by my friend's roommate Nicole.  Luckily this falls under supporting fellow artists, because it didn't cross my mind not to get a pair.  

She made these earrings by hand, and I love them.  She's a super talented artist, her room is filled with all sort of interesting hanging pieces, and prints and beautiful mounted insects.  I encourage you all to check out her website: www.nicolecolella.com.  Buy her jewelry!

I did have a moment or two of distress at the airport when I questioned whether I really wanted to read the books I'd brought, but I just didn't go in the bookstores.  Those books are overpriced, and I don't need them.  Suck it up!

Okay, so for those of you who have made it this far, this is where it gets interesting.  I have a dilemma: I want a vibrator.  I haven't had one for a long time, but now I kind of need one.  (Sorry if you're reading this Mom, I don't mean to embarrass you.)  So I can't decide if this falls under toiletries?  It seems like I ought to try to find one made of recyclable materials, but that seems kind of gross, right?  And yet, recycled products like plastic bottles have to be sterilized or whatever, so is it really that different?  Obviously a straight-up used dildo is out of the question (ew).  I have also considered the fact that I've made it this far without one... I guess it bears research.  

I'm just being me here, folks.  Keep it respectful.  xoxox

This is for my friend

I don't know if it makes a difference to know that a piece of your sadness is being carried around all the way over here on the West Coast, but I've been bearing your pain all day. A marvelous light burnt out tonight. Nothing can replace it or make it better.

I had a vision of her shooting up into the sky like a rocket. Blindingly bright. She burned faster and brighter all night and when she finally burned out her ashes dispersed peppering the sky with stars.

This is all nonsense. Nothing I say can give you back what you lost. But I want you to know that my heart really hurts for you. And you should be comforted knowing that her wonderful light isn't extinguished, it burns in you. You're a piece of her. It might sound like a cliche, but it's the truth. It's immortality.

Fuck all the outside noise: you're my friend for the rest of my life. Your pain is my pain, your loss is my loss. You're not hurting alone.  My heart breaks for you.  I'm sorry friend.